Two Years and Counting

Today we complete two years of being married. And it's been a great ride so far*. 

We had a small, pleasant dinner with family today. In a few hours, we are off to Kerala for a holiday. We intend to relax by the lake side, where I will read and my husband** will take pictures. We will spend a day in a houseboat which will be all to ourselves***. And we will explore Kochi. I am really looking forward to this, and I need to go now and pack so that I am not short of books, clothes or sunscreen (in that order!).

For our anniversary, Nike gifted me the entire Tintin collection. *big grin*. I ordered a whole bunch of things for him but they are all coming from abroad and the shipment has been delayed so I can't talk about it till they are here. :-(

Since his gifts have been delayed, I decided to order a very special cake for now. I happened to hear about this lady who makes gorgeous novelty cakes and got in touch with her; we discussed themes in great detail, she sent some designs and finally this is what she made for us:

Isn't it the the most fabulous cake ever? I'm totally, utterly, completely wowed by it. 

* On the days when we fight , I console myself by saying that atleast we haven't yet killed each other. Though my family and friends predict that it will be Nike who will eventually kill himself for having to deal with me! With friends like this.....

** It took me two whole years to start referring to him as 'my husband'. For the longest time, I couldn't bring myself to say the word. So much so that I would tell random people that he was my boyfriend or my friend, simply because I couldn't say the word out loud. I've finally learnt to say it, and I'm now enjoying how it sounds.

*** Well, except the boatmen and the cook of course, and I wouldn't want to get on to any houseboat without them!

The One in Which I Italicise. A Lot.

The Pondicherry trip was okay. I would have enjoyed it a lot more if Nike hadn’t cribbed through the two days. Sure, we didn’t get anything to eat on the train to Chennai, and the bus to Pondicherry broke down, and the next bus we got on to had standing space only, and Auro beach was dirty and stinking and Auroville was closed by the time we got there, but STILL.

In Pondicherry, we didn’t do much. We stayed at a lovely heritage home. I love these old heritage homes, with their high ceilings, wide open courtyards, wooden beams and heavy doorknobs, and this one was all that and more. They served vadas and dosas and idlis for breakfast and it was all just perfect (see how I italicise all those words like I’m an Indian Writing in English, which I am, but I meant like a published author writing literary stuff, you know).

Anyway. We ate a lot in Pondicherry. We went to all these places where they served Creole cuisine. The food was expensive but very good. Nike complained that Creole cuisine seemed no different from the generic Continental cuisine but I said that was okay because Creole = French, and France is a part of the continent. He wasn’t reassured so on the final day he said we should eat the local cuisine which was Chettinad cuisine. And I said no, the local cuisine is Karaikudi cuisine. No matter, he said, and took me to Anjappar where we asked for Chettinad Chicken and got served Pepper Chicken instead. We enjoyed it until we found out it was Pepper Chicken and not Chettinad Chicken, and then we felt quite betrayed and disappointed. I theorised that we should never eat at chain restaurants that open branches abroad because then their focus is on their foreign branches, while the poor locals have to deal with sub-standard food and service.

We drove down to Auro Beach one evening, and it was dirty and stinking and Nike said “Gah! Vizag beach is a hundred times better than this” and I felt inordinately pleased; though in retrospect, I’m not exactly sure that was a compliment. We then drove to Auroville which was closed by the time we reached there but I was determined to enjoy the tiny little villages we drove through, except that Nike started a long discussion about why people would want to leave everything to come and live in an ashram in the middle of nowhere, and I gave him millions of reasons why people would want to do so, but he didn’t find any of the reasons convincing so I told him sternly that he shouldn’t judge other people by his own warped world view, but I don’t think he cared much for my words of wisdom. Oh well!

We walked up and down the promenade quite a bit, and it felt good to just sit and watch the waves crashing against the rocks. We also drove around the quaint French Quarter, which was simply lovely, and it made me want to go and live in France. Though I suppose I could as well go and live in Pondicherry! Apparently, Pondicherry is also home to 153 temples – which isn’t really surprising because there is a temple.on.every.single.street – but we didn’t visit any.

Our bus ride back to Chennai was eventful, to say the least. We got on to a bus which went by the bypass road instead of the ECR, and then the conductor convinced us to get off at this place called Perungalathur which is on the outskirts of Chennai. The auto drivers asked for 500 bucks!, yes you read that right, 500 bucks! to take us to the city.

Instead, we decided to take the local train, which cost only 12 bucks for the two of us, and where I had my own Alaipayuthey/Sakhi/Saathiya moment. I got into the ladies’ compartment and Nike got into the adjoining general compartment, and then I realised that my phone, wallet and ticket were all with Nike. And so at the next stop I ran into the adjoining compartment, which could as well have been a men’s compartment since it had only men (duh!), and pushed my way through the men, all the while urgently calling out for Nike. Every single person in the compartment was staring at me, and when I finally found Nike, there was a hushed silence, and I felt like they were all waiting for me to do something filmy, (like maybe hug him and burst into tears?). Instead, I took my wallet, phone and tickets from him, and ran back to my own compartment, leaving our audience very disappointed. Such drama in our lives, I tell you!

After this, we reached Chennai safe and sound, and made it to the wedding in time. The bride was looking absolutely radiant and lovely, and the groom was looking decent, which is saying a lot for him (BJ, I hope you’re reading this). We congratulated the happy couple, thulped the yummy food and headed back to the hotel for a night out with the gang. It shows how much we have matured over the years that everyone stayed sober that night. Well, that’s not really true, but nobody got drunk either and we all turned in by 2.30 that night, and some of us even woke up at 5am that morning and made it to the wedding on time, while the rest trooped in for breakfast. This new-found discipline and punctuality is a sure sign of old age.

So that’s all about Pondicherry and Chennai. I had more adventures on my way to Bhubaneswar and I had a great time at home in Vizag for Deepavali but for now, I’ll leave you with this much. How was your Deepavali?

Finally...

    

  Finally, finally, finally I have my life back! 

   

   So here is what happened in the last one month:   

• I had a good trip to Kashmir. A very fruitful work trip. I also met some really warm, wonderful people and made new friends. And managed to do a bit of sightseeing. Kashmir, and its people, are totally enchanting, and I’m going to be back soon.

• I also went to Dehradun for two days on work. I spent most of those two days in the airport but it was a good trip work-wise.

• I finally managed to get started on one of the personal projects I was ranting about in the previous posts. It’s just a start, but it’s a good start, and it’s given me some confidence that I can do it. There is more work on that project coming up in November but now I have the confidence to handle it.

• I gave the GRE, and did pretty well, considering I had absolutely no preparation. Since it’s the new format the results won’t be out till mid-November, but at the end of the test the computer told me that the equivalent score according to the old format was in the 1500-1600 range. I understand that’s a very good score, so I am quite pleased with my performance.

• I also sat for an exam for one module of my distance learning course, and I didn’t do as badly as I expected. I think I stand a good chance of passing. So that’s over and done with. And I am not taking up the next module till January so I get some breathing time.

·         After all these trips and exams came Nike’s brothers wedding. The wedding was in Delhi but there were a lot of pre and post wedding events that kept us busy. It was a lot of fun, with people coming down from across the country to celebrate, and there were so many people and so many festivities it made me quite dizzy. But lots of fun was had, everything went off very smoothly, and the happy couple is now in Europe on their honeymoon while we continue to be disoriented and tired and suffer from the empty house syndrome.

I’m back to work, and I’m still a little disoriented from l that’s been happening, but I’m slowly getting back into the groove, and looking forward to a more relaxed life where I go to office, do my work, and relax in the evenings. Day before, after work, I met up with Srinu (who’s here from the US) for a brief while and then hung out at Gloria Jeans at Inorbit with Samee.

Yesterday, Nike and I went to a random Telugu movie – it’s called Pilla Zamindar, and while I’m loathe to call it a bad movie given its interesting concept, it’s a badly made movie with awful production values, so it’s probably much kinder to think of it as a tele-serial. We then went out for dinner; ArmyMan was supposed to join us but he ditched in the last minute (and today he calls to ask if I want to meet for lunch on a day when I’m swamped at work!!!). And after dinner, we came home and watched an episode of Dexter and I even read for a while (‘The Wish Maker’ by Ali Sethi).

It’s been so long since I’ve had such normal, relaxed days that I am truly relishing this time. Sometimes, I feel guilty about wasting my time when I should be studying/ working on my personal projects/working to meet some deadline – and then I catch myself and tell myself that I don’t have to feel guilty any longer, my time is finally mine. Life is good!

Tonight Nike and I leave for Pondicherry – I’ve been wanting to go there forever, and we’ve finally found the time and opportunity to make a quick trip. From Pondicherry to Chennai for BJ and Maggu’s wedding – I’ve been telling them how happy I am that Maggu is finally make an honest man of BJ, and that they mustn’t forget the key role I played in bringing them together, and I’d love to tell you guys the story but it isn’t fit for family forums like this, really. I will be meeting the rest of the gang in Chennai too and it’s been so long since I met them so I’m really looking forward to this.

From Chennai I am going to Bhubaneswar for two days on work. AND from Bhubaneswar I am going to Vizag for just one day, but that one day is Deepavali, and for now, I can live with that. I didn’t think I would get to go home for Deepavali, what with the festival falling bang in the middle of the week, and the travel to Chennai and all, but things somehow came together and I’m going to be in Vizag for just that day and I’m happy. It’s not that we celebrate with a lot of dhoom-dhamaka - Samee is scared of fireworks and crackers and while I really enjoy them, I’ve given up on them for the past couple of years – but I haven’t been home for a single festival this year so I am happy I am finally making it to the last but one festival.

Oh! And my poor, neglected blog turned seven this month. SEVEN years, y’all! 

Like A Yo Yo

I wrote this post last Tuesday but was too busy to publish it till now. Also, when I wasn't too busy I was too lazy. Or forgetful. Such is life.

Warning: Long, whiny, annoying post ahead. Please feel free to skip and head to the last 3-4 paragraphs; actually, no, I INSIST that you skip the whole sorry post and head directly to the last 3-4 paragraphs.

The last week, everything in my life was going wrong.

At work, I had undertaken a new task in mid-August for a 4 month period, pushing back my main project by those four months. Yet, a month after I had made my new work plan, I was unable to secure a single appointment with the people I needed to meet; basically, I had nothing to show for all my efforts for the past month, I was behind my work plan, my main project was getting delayed, my work load was piling up, and all of this was increasingly stressing me out.

To make things work, my work from home policy had also been changed. Earlier I worked from home about twice a week, so the 3/3.5 hour commute I did wasn’t so bad because it was only thrice a week. But the idea of spending 15-17 hours a week commuting, the very thought itself was enough to make me want to cry.

And then you know the distance learning course I am doing? Well, I covered only about one-fourth of the portion I am supposed to have covered by now. And my exams are in the first week of October *This is the cue for full on panic attack* So I had this assignment to submit last Tuesday, and I spent ALL NIGHT up working on the assignment, and due to a genuine confusion about submission timelines, I missed the submission deadline by a few minutes. Which means I have to defer the module and take it in another session – so the studying I had done for this particular module, the time I had spent working on the assignment, the money I had spent on registering for the exam, they were all down the drain; not to speak of how awful I feel about not being able to keep up with what I had set out to do.

And remember those two personal projects I had mentioned in a previous post (I know that by now they are all beginning to sound the same)? Well, I haven’t so much as started on them, and one of them is due to end on September 30^th. And the other one a couple of days after that. Argh!!!   

To make things work, I was constantly disappointing my family. Amma is in IIMA on a Faculty Development Programme and she wanted me to go visit her in Ahmedabad. I booked tickets to go, but every weekend, either or both of us had various commitments and the tickets kept getting endlessly postponed. Finally, I never went, and she’s heading back next weekend. She was there for over 3 whole months, and I couldn’t make the time to go visit her for even one weekend. I can’t even begin to describe how awful I feel about it.

And Nike’s family was disappointed that I was too busy to be involved in the wedding work (Nike’s brother is getting married in October). Cards, menu, shopping, decoration – whatever the task, I cry off saying I have to study or work. So I’m sending the message that I am not interested in being a more active part of this wedding.

Meanwhile, my social life is non-existent. I have seen an average of one movie a month since moving to Hyderabad in April – earlier I would watch a movie a week. I go out for dinner or clubbing about twice a month – again, earlier this would be once or twice a week. And for other stuff – day trips, picnics, plays, concerts etc. – I haven’t had that life since I moved here. I hadn’t met some of my closest friends in MONTHS, despite living in the same city. I hadn’t met Pinni in so many weeks.

And by Thursday, I couldn’t take it anymore. It felt like my life was completely unravelling. That night, my friend A called up and casually asked me how I was doing and I was * this * close to breaking down and sobbing. All this stress and panic got so bad that I started feeling rather unwell; I woke up on Friday morning feeling so tired that it was exhausting to even get out of bed, and I called in sick to work.

And then, the much needed break happened. At noon on Friday, I got confirmed appointments for meetings in Kashmir! This was so many birds with one stone – first, my new task at work was finally taking off, and I know that once the first meeting happens, it’s easy to get the other meetings; second, since I would be in Kashmir the whole week, I would not have to commute; third, working on the field actually saves me a lot of time (because I save time commuting, save the time I need to spend with family, save time in meetings and administrative work at office, and get back to my room much earlier) and gives me more time to study and focus on my personal projects.

And finally, I get a short holiday in Kashmir!

I felt so much better that I immediately planned activities to correct things and prod them along in the other areas also. This weekend, I did wedding shopping and planning with the in-laws, visited Pinni, met friends for dinner, and got started on the . Next weekend, Amma will be in Hyderabad and I intend to spend time with her.

I am writing this post from Kashmir (I landed in Srinagar on Tuesday afternoon) and already, I feel so much better. I’m calmer, more peaceful, and more confident about my ability to handle this phase. I just need to stretch myself a little for the next one month, and I will be fine. So all’s well that ends well.

Ding Dong Bell

Because that’s as good a title as any for the nonsensical post that is to follow.

So I’ve continued to be insanely busy through August too. My work has suddenly picked up pace. The distance learning course continues to be demanding – lots of readings, regular assignment submissions etc. On top of this, I have taken on two personal projects – both of which require significant investment of time, effort and money. And because we are no staying with the in-laws, we have all sorts of family obligations to fulfill. It’s a classic case of biting off way more than I can chew.

I like my days to be full and busy – but this is too much, I say. I constantly feel sleepy and exhausted. The sense of being hassled accompanies me all the time. My social life has come to a standstill. If I so much as plan to go out for dinner on a weekend, I start to feel guilty about the billion things on my to-do list. And to add salt to the wound, some of the things I have been working on fell through, and that put me in a blue funk for a while. The worst part is that this situation won’t change till November.

Alright, now I’m done with the whining.

The best part of this month was that Nike and I took a short holiday to Cambodia. Yay! So we got engaged on August 15^th two years ago – and since we just need an excuse to travel and since this August 15^th holiday gave us a long weekend, we took another 3 days off and set off for Cambodia. I wanted to go to Kerala since I had already been to Cambodia, but Nike was keen on Cambodia, and because of all his dashed birthday travel plans, I graciously gave in to his wishes. I also made it very clear that next time, I get to decide our holiday destination, mutual agreement be damned. Ahem!

So Cambodia – which was just Siem Reap, actually – was all things fun and interesting. We stayed in this lovely little boutique hotel with a nice pool, and the most marvelous staff, and a four poster bed. It was wonderful. We had a really good guide who took us around the most important temples around the Angkor Park region for the first two days. And on the third day, we got this super-sweet and super-talkative driver who took us to the temples in the outskirts, and to the floating forest.

On the last day we just got long, luxurious massages, hung out with other travelers, shopped at the local markets, and just soaked in the very touristy atmosphere of Siem Reap. It was a lovely holiday, but it was also tiring and too short. And since I had a bad cold from the time my flight from Bangalore took off, I had pretty much drugged myself throughout the holiday, so when I came back home I was rather disoriented. I’ve been saying that I need a holiday from the holiday, but nobody listens to me.

Now I must be off, for tonight we are going to the old city area to check out the Ramzan festivities, and eat Haleem.