New Year Resolutions (Alternative Title: Foolish Hopes)

As a child, and even as an adolescent, I was wise and mature. As I grow older however, I am becoming more childish and immature with each passing year, and seem to be regressing both emotionally and mentally. Nowhere is this more evident than in the fact that when I was younger, I refused to make New Year resolutions, knowing that I wouldn’t keep them anyway. But all the wisdom of my childhood and teens vanished as I entered into my twenties; and now, even though I’m well on my way to bidding farewell to my twenties, I refuse to learn from the failures of the past years, and continue to doggedly make resolutions.

After much reflection, I decided that there was a woeful lack of discipline in my life, and that it had caused a fair amount of frustration and misery in the past couple of years. Yes, it took me this long to reach that conclusion. Anyway. So I decided that the theme for 2012 was going to be DISCIPLINE. With a capital D. Oh, well, I guess you got that already.

So my resolutions this year are centred on bringing more discipline into various aspects of my life, both personal and professional. And today I’m going to list them out on this blog in the hope that making them public will pressurise me into putting more effort to stick to them.

1.      Eat healthy

I have very unhealthy eating habits and have been working to change it for the last couple of years, with limited success. I’ve decided to keep track of what I eat on a daily basis so that I have a better idea of what is going into my body. Also, I’m going to try to generally eat more of the good foods and less of the bad foods.

·         Eat more of greens, vegetables and fruits. Try to drink milk once a day. Try to drink at least two litres of water every day. Try eating something green at least once a week. Ideally, try to eat something every 2-3 hours. Snack on fruits and nuts instead of junk food.

·         Cut down on the unhealthy foods. Not more than 600ml of cola a week. Not more than two single scoops of ice-cream/one sundae a week. Not more than one visit to a coffee shop in a week. Cut down on biscuits, chocolates, pastries, puffs and other snacks. Replace regular oil with olive oil.

2.      Work out

This is a resolution that I have been struggling to keep up for the last couple of years. The goal is to work out atleast 3 times a week – I could potentially do yoga, badminton, swimming or aerobics. I don’t need to lose weight but I definitely want to be fit and toned, and look good for the beach at the end of the year.

3.      Take better personal care

Now this is the resolution that I have been most successful with in the last couple of years; and through this resolution, I have managed to incorporate a lot of small (and seemingly silly) changes in taking care of myself. For this year, I am going to try to: brush my teeth twice a day, floss every day, take my multi-vitamins daily, oil my hair once a week, moisturise thoroughly, use a face pack/scrub once a week, and visit the salon regularly.

4.      Write regularly

For the longest time, I believed that one either has a flair for writing or one doesn’t, and that’s that. But I’ve come to appreciate that just like any other skill, writing takes time, effort and practice. And that working on your writing is what makes one a better writer, not sitting at the laptop and waiting for inspiration to strike. So my resolution is to write more regularly (at least three times a week) and put more thought and effort into my writing than I currently do.

5.      Learn new things

I have realised that in the last few years I haven’t learnt anything new. Not a single damn thing. And it makes me so ashamed of myself. Especially because there are so many things I want to learn and so do! So this year I am going to make an effort to learn on new thing. So this year I am going to focus on: learning to tie a saree, learning to cook/bake, learning to swim, learning a foreign language and learning to drive on real roads (as opposed to imaginary roads without any traffic). I will be happy to achieve at learn at least two of these skills.  

6.      Function more efficiently

I am quite the Queen of Procrastination. I leave everything till the very last minute, and then scramble to finish things on time. The good part is that I work best under pressure and can always be counted on to meet tight deadlines. At my earlier job, I was the go-to person for last minute work and urgent proposals. The bad part about it is that it leads to stress, tension and general negativity that I can do very well without. Now this procrastination is not limited to my professional life but extends to my personal life as well – I am very lax about responding to calls, emails, doing favours I have promised to do etc.

So this year I am going to work on being more efficient – both professionally and personally. At the beginning of every day, I am going to make a list of things I need to finish on that particular day and I will not leave office till I finish it off – that way, I will be under pressure to finish my work for the day and not take work home. Every weekend, I will make a list of errands to be done for the weekend, and ensure I finish them off that very weekend rather than postpone it for the weekend that never comes. I am also going to make an effort to respond to all personal calls and emails before I hit the bed.

Now wish me luck for this one!

7.      De-clutter

This has been one of my resolutions for 2011 as well, and I did rather well on this front. Last year, the aim of de-cluttering my life was to not store/buy things I did not need in my life. The move to Hyderabad was very helpful because I gave away a lot of things I did not use before packing up and moving. And since then, I ask myself ‘do I need this?” before making even the simplest of purchases. Except books; they have been my only indulgence this year, and quite frankly, I don’t care to cut down on that.

This year, my resolution is to simply continue with the de-clutter mantra and question myself before making any purchase. I am also going to give away clothes, books and other things that I don’t need anymore. Most importantly, I am going to work on building a lifestyle where I simply don’t need so many things anymore.

So those are my resolutions for 2012. Wish me luck in keeping them. Oh, and what are your resolutions for this year?

Happy Happy 2012

Happy New Year Everyone!

So the last week of 2011 has been very interesting. We did a road trip along the Konkan coast in a beat up old car; and it turned out to be a trip that neither and Nike will ever forget. We experienced secluded beaches, soft golden sands, clear waters, charming little fishing villages, delicious seafood, imposing forts in the middle of the sea, and unbelievably scenic views. We also had many misadventures – getting lost, running out of fuel, car breaking down, leaving our ID cards behind and driving an extra 80kms to retrieve them, being refused a hotel room because we didn’t have proof of being married, our car engine sending out crazy fumes in the middle of a traffic ham, driving to what we thought was the hill station Khandala, only to find out it was some random little village of the same name!

We landed up in Goa two days before New Years Eve. This is my fourth NYE in Goa in 7 years – every other year, I end up there. Every time I go there, I am turned off by the crowds and the traffic jams and tell myself I won’t do this again – and promptly land up in time for NYE. Clearly, I am not growing up. Goa this year was alright – we spent our mornings lying on the beach and playing in the water, and the evenings going wild. By the end of our 3 days there, we were all bruised and battered, quite literally. I still have my battle scars from Goa.

New Years Eve itself was like any other in Goa. We went hopping from one beach to another, in search of the perfect party (hint: there is no perfect party). In the course of the night, we played Taboo, spent some time at a pick-up joint, participated in a fire ritual, passed off as a Russian from Vladivostok and fell into a ditch while running away from some hens (which were locked up in a big cage). And to top it all, we reached the car and found out it was punctured! What can I say? A crazy end to a crazy year.

2011 started on a good note. We spent all of January traveling across South East Asia. In February, I saw many of my friends and cousins get married, turned 27, and had a lovely time at home in Vizag with family and friends. In March, I went on a lovely holiday to Rajasthan, and then made the most of my last month in Bangalore. In April, I moved to Hyderabad and joined an exciting new job and fell headlong into a hectic social life. In May, I spent a lovely week in Mussoorie, started learning the ropes at my new job and continued to have a busy social life.

But things started going downhill from then on. The last 7 months of the year were quite awful. There were 6 deaths in my family. Two of my closest friends are headed for a divorce. Three other very close friends are involved in messy relationships which are causing them a lot of grief and pain. Some people very close to me have been facing health issues.

Personally too, it hasn’t been a great year for me. I took on way more than I could handle, what with the distance learning course, and my many personal projects, and ended up feeling stressed and pressurised all the time. I slipped often in the process, and then beat myself up endlessly for it. I didn’t really spend much time with family and friends either because I was just so busy all the time.  My social life came to a complete standstill – no movies, no reading, no dinners, no clubbing, nothing.

At work, things simply weren’t going the way I had planned so that was also another major source of stress. And none of the holidays helped! I was sick throughout the time we were in Siem Reap. Nike didn’t enjoy our weekend in Pondicherry. Our three days in Kerala were a massive disappointment. And our year-end road trip was not smooth sailing either.

So yes, I’m happy to see the end of 2011. And I’m really looking forward to 2012. I want this to be a year of big changes and much excitement; a year during which I work to be a better person; but also a fun and happy year. And for you and yousr too, I wish for a year filled with health, happiness, love and laughter. Happy New Year!

Of Nike

Dee and SAB have done this fun tag where they listed seven weird things about their partners. And even as I was reading their posts, I was making a list of all the weird things Nike does.

So without much further ado, here is the list:

1.   Nike is obsessed about his hair, or specifically, about losing his hair. He used to oil it EVERY SINGLE DAY, much to my irritation. After much whining on my part, he now oils his hair every other day only (and says he will blame me if he loses his hair!). And he uses an expensive, special oil meant for hair growth. Now all this will make sense if the man had thinning/balding hair but he is blessed with a head full of thick hair so I just don’t understand his paranoia. He’s even calculated how much it will cost for him to undergo hair-weaving treatment if the need arises, and says he felt relieved when he found out it was well within his means – and he was NOT joking!

2.   His attitude to money is very weird. When he has money, he will blow it up like its Christmas every day. If he likes something, he will buy it without even looking at the price tag. And when he doesn’t have money, he will happily sit at home and not spend a penny the whole month! He has lakhs owing to him from a previous employer – after a few months of trying to get the money from him, he’s simply shrugged and given up. Sometimes, I think about it and feel bad for him, but it really doesn’t bother him at all. He recently lost 15000 bucks and it didn’t pinch him much. ‘It’s just money’’ is the thought that defines his attitude to it.

3.    He’s bloody good at everything he takes up! When he takes up something, he shows incredible commitment towards it and works very, very hard at it. When he started DJing at IIMB, he ended up getting professional offers! Six years after IIMB, people mail him to tell him they were at a party, and that they wished he was there to play music. He started cooking when he was in Singapore and within a few months he got so good that when friends hosted parties, they’d call him up and ask if he could bring along his special biryani or his kebabs to the party.

His latest love is photography. He’s been into it only for a year and a half now, but he’s been featured in the Flickr Hall of Fame, has been shortlisted for a National Geographic contest, and even been paid hundreds of dollars by Getty Images for his photos. He has thousands of people visiting his Flickr and FB pages and each photo of his gets hundreds of comments. Gah!

4.   He LOVES shoes. He’s like a male Carrie or something. He can’t resist buying shoes every few months. If we happen to be in a mall or a market, he will inevitably go and check out some shoes. He recently bought a pair of shoes and he loved them so much he wanted to buy another pair of the same, only in a different colour this time!

5.     He swears by the wisdom of ‘prevention is better than cure’. If he so much as coughs or sneezes, he will completely give up on cold water, take a medicine and stay indoors. If he runs a slight fever for one day, that is enough for him to start on antibiotics. That said and done, he handles illness very calmly – doesn’t curl up in bed and moan for mother like someone else in this house (ahem) does.

6.    He looks good in just about everything. When we first started shopping together, I’d be alarmed at some of the stuff he’d pick out because it looked too weird or funky. And he’d try it on, and he would totally pull it off. If you think this is a biased wife speaking, then ask Samee. The first time she came shopping with us, she was gob smacked at how Nike looked good in everything he tried on. After seeing this for a few years now, she’s told him she’d like him to be her model if she ever gets a designer line out for men.

P.S: If you think it’s a good thing, it’s not! For my self-esteem, that is. I forbid Nike from trying on anything when I go on a mission to buy jeans. The experience is traumatic by itself without the man effortlessly fitting into every single pair in the showroom. Hmph!

7.   With the exception of biryani, he cares very little for food. He never craves for a particular type of food, like other normal human beings do at times. If you were to tell him that he will be denied a particular food for the rest of his life, he wouldn’t be too bothered by it. All this with the exception of biryani of course.

I can write much more about Nike and his eccentricities but I think I have done enough damage for one day. ;-)

Two Years and Counting

Today we complete two years of being married. And it's been a great ride so far*. 

We had a small, pleasant dinner with family today. In a few hours, we are off to Kerala for a holiday. We intend to relax by the lake side, where I will read and my husband** will take pictures. We will spend a day in a houseboat which will be all to ourselves***. And we will explore Kochi. I am really looking forward to this, and I need to go now and pack so that I am not short of books, clothes or sunscreen (in that order!).

For our anniversary, Nike gifted me the entire Tintin collection. *big grin*. I ordered a whole bunch of things for him but they are all coming from abroad and the shipment has been delayed so I can't talk about it till they are here. :-(

Since his gifts have been delayed, I decided to order a very special cake for now. I happened to hear about this lady who makes gorgeous novelty cakes and got in touch with her; we discussed themes in great detail, she sent some designs and finally this is what she made for us:

Isn't it the the most fabulous cake ever? I'm totally, utterly, completely wowed by it. 

* On the days when we fight , I console myself by saying that atleast we haven't yet killed each other. Though my family and friends predict that it will be Nike who will eventually kill himself for having to deal with me! With friends like this.....

** It took me two whole years to start referring to him as 'my husband'. For the longest time, I couldn't bring myself to say the word. So much so that I would tell random people that he was my boyfriend or my friend, simply because I couldn't say the word out loud. I've finally learnt to say it, and I'm now enjoying how it sounds.

*** Well, except the boatmen and the cook of course, and I wouldn't want to get on to any houseboat without them!

The One in Which I Italicise. A Lot.

The Pondicherry trip was okay. I would have enjoyed it a lot more if Nike hadn’t cribbed through the two days. Sure, we didn’t get anything to eat on the train to Chennai, and the bus to Pondicherry broke down, and the next bus we got on to had standing space only, and Auro beach was dirty and stinking and Auroville was closed by the time we got there, but STILL.

In Pondicherry, we didn’t do much. We stayed at a lovely heritage home. I love these old heritage homes, with their high ceilings, wide open courtyards, wooden beams and heavy doorknobs, and this one was all that and more. They served vadas and dosas and idlis for breakfast and it was all just perfect (see how I italicise all those words like I’m an Indian Writing in English, which I am, but I meant like a published author writing literary stuff, you know).

Anyway. We ate a lot in Pondicherry. We went to all these places where they served Creole cuisine. The food was expensive but very good. Nike complained that Creole cuisine seemed no different from the generic Continental cuisine but I said that was okay because Creole = French, and France is a part of the continent. He wasn’t reassured so on the final day he said we should eat the local cuisine which was Chettinad cuisine. And I said no, the local cuisine is Karaikudi cuisine. No matter, he said, and took me to Anjappar where we asked for Chettinad Chicken and got served Pepper Chicken instead. We enjoyed it until we found out it was Pepper Chicken and not Chettinad Chicken, and then we felt quite betrayed and disappointed. I theorised that we should never eat at chain restaurants that open branches abroad because then their focus is on their foreign branches, while the poor locals have to deal with sub-standard food and service.

We drove down to Auro Beach one evening, and it was dirty and stinking and Nike said “Gah! Vizag beach is a hundred times better than this” and I felt inordinately pleased; though in retrospect, I’m not exactly sure that was a compliment. We then drove to Auroville which was closed by the time we reached there but I was determined to enjoy the tiny little villages we drove through, except that Nike started a long discussion about why people would want to leave everything to come and live in an ashram in the middle of nowhere, and I gave him millions of reasons why people would want to do so, but he didn’t find any of the reasons convincing so I told him sternly that he shouldn’t judge other people by his own warped world view, but I don’t think he cared much for my words of wisdom. Oh well!

We walked up and down the promenade quite a bit, and it felt good to just sit and watch the waves crashing against the rocks. We also drove around the quaint French Quarter, which was simply lovely, and it made me want to go and live in France. Though I suppose I could as well go and live in Pondicherry! Apparently, Pondicherry is also home to 153 temples – which isn’t really surprising because there is a temple.on.every.single.street – but we didn’t visit any.

Our bus ride back to Chennai was eventful, to say the least. We got on to a bus which went by the bypass road instead of the ECR, and then the conductor convinced us to get off at this place called Perungalathur which is on the outskirts of Chennai. The auto drivers asked for 500 bucks!, yes you read that right, 500 bucks! to take us to the city.

Instead, we decided to take the local train, which cost only 12 bucks for the two of us, and where I had my own Alaipayuthey/Sakhi/Saathiya moment. I got into the ladies’ compartment and Nike got into the adjoining general compartment, and then I realised that my phone, wallet and ticket were all with Nike. And so at the next stop I ran into the adjoining compartment, which could as well have been a men’s compartment since it had only men (duh!), and pushed my way through the men, all the while urgently calling out for Nike. Every single person in the compartment was staring at me, and when I finally found Nike, there was a hushed silence, and I felt like they were all waiting for me to do something filmy, (like maybe hug him and burst into tears?). Instead, I took my wallet, phone and tickets from him, and ran back to my own compartment, leaving our audience very disappointed. Such drama in our lives, I tell you!

After this, we reached Chennai safe and sound, and made it to the wedding in time. The bride was looking absolutely radiant and lovely, and the groom was looking decent, which is saying a lot for him (BJ, I hope you’re reading this). We congratulated the happy couple, thulped the yummy food and headed back to the hotel for a night out with the gang. It shows how much we have matured over the years that everyone stayed sober that night. Well, that’s not really true, but nobody got drunk either and we all turned in by 2.30 that night, and some of us even woke up at 5am that morning and made it to the wedding on time, while the rest trooped in for breakfast. This new-found discipline and punctuality is a sure sign of old age.

So that’s all about Pondicherry and Chennai. I had more adventures on my way to Bhubaneswar and I had a great time at home in Vizag for Deepavali but for now, I’ll leave you with this much. How was your Deepavali?