So remember the exciting new phase that I was looking forward to? Well, it didn’t happen. I don’t want to
get into details, but let’s just say that this Big Change that was supposed
occur in September, which would put me in a very exciting place in terms of
career and location, didn’t quite work out for reasons that were beyond my
control. I’d been looking forward to it from January, and couldn’t wait for the
year to go by and for September to come soon enough. But when September did
finally come, it brought with it the news that the Big Change wasn’t meant to
be.
Of course, I’m very upset and
extremely disappointed. I’d been dreaming about this for the whole year. I quit
my job end of last month in anticipation of this. I shopped, I went to
Bangalore to bid farewell to my friends there, I bought flights tickets, I
spoke to movers, I made a to-do-list. I went on holiday, and then went home to
Vizag to spend time with the parents before I was off. And then I found out I
wasn’t going after all, that it wasn’t happening.
I could even now probably go and
join back my old job, but I think it’s time for me to move on. This job has
been quite an experience, but I think I’m ready to move on another role now. But
I need a break before I can plunge back into work again - I had imagined the
Big Change for a whole year, I can’t just go back to work now as if nothing has
happened.
I’m in Vizag still, and keeping
myself very, very busy. Nike and I are planning a long holiday somewhere. The
end of the holiday will coincide with a two week family trip to Malaysia for
Cousin K’s wedding. I also need this time to think through what I should do
next that will best suit my long term career goals – I have a number of
interesting options ahead of me, but I want to make a careful choice in terms
of what fits in with my career plans.
Meanwhile, here is what has been
keeping me busy in Vizag for the last couple of weeks:
- I’m taking a course “History of the World since 1300” on Coursera. For a huge history buff like me, this course is absolutely fascinating. It’s the second week into the course, and I’ve learnt about Genghis Khan, the Black Death, the Ming Dynasty, Christendom and Islam, Discovery of America, the Columbian Exchange, Colonialism and the Baroque Era. The course is offered by a fantastic professor from Princeton University. I CANNOT wait for the next couple of classes. The best part? It’s completely free! Do check out www.coursera.org – they have close to 200 courses across a wide range of subjects, offered by professors from some of the world’s best universities; and all this absolutely free. Do, do, do check it out – I cannot recommend it enough!
- I’m finally brushing up on my very rusty driving skills (I use the word very loosely here). I go driving for an hour every day. Of course, considering I am driving in Vizag, I’m rather sceptical about this practice being of any use if I have to drive in a bigger city with more traffic. Still; I had been developing a massive mental block against driving, and this driving practice has been very helpful in removing that mental block to some extent.
- I have also taken up a home improvement project
of sorts. If you know the condition of my house, you will realise how
physically demanding this project is, and also, how impossible it is. The maid
and I spent three days just to clear up the guest bedroom and convert it into a
room for Nike and me. One day was spent cleaning up and re-arranging the dining
room. Other little projects – removing an AC from one room and replacing it in
another, clearing up and re-arranging the open shelves in the parents room,
dusting and re-arranging the books on the library shelves, getting a new side
table, getting the dining chairs repaired, getting new bath curtains etc. –
take up a few hours in a day. I belong to a
family of hoarders; Amma leads admirably on this front, storing every little
thing that strays into the house, even if it’s just a pamphlet from a few years
ago. Samee is not far behind, refusing to throw away toiletries even if they
are beyond the expiry date. And Dad just keeps piling up his old papers;
convinced that they will be of some use in the distant future (he is probably
dreaming of a time when paper will replace money or something). I’ve mercifully
been spared this vice, and in fact, am quite ruthless about disposing things
that I feel are of no use, and have almost no attachment to material things.
But clearing the home of a family of hoarders is still quite an
uphillimpossible task. Our maid is quite wonderful – very enthusiastic about all these projects and extremely efficient. But for all that, I’m sure she’s counting the days to when I would leave. - I'm reading quite voraciously too. I’m right now in the middle of a five part series on Genghis Khan by Conn Iggulden. I keep breaking the series up with lighter reads like Wodehouse or Georgette Heyer, and it feels good to go back to my old reading habit after what seems like ages.
- I have signed up for an online volunteering project. I am yet to receive a final confirmation of whether or not I have been assigned to the project, so I don’t want to talk too much about it before that happens. But I hope it works out, and it works out soon, because I am excited to be working on it.
- I'm also spending quite a bit of time thinking about what I want to do next, researching possible options, talking to people in the sector. I have a tendency to just go along with the flow, but I have over six years of work experience now, and feel that my next move will be very critical in terms of the direction my career will take. I don’t want to do anything hasty at this stage, and want to think through this very carefully before deciding on what to do next.
- Some amount of my day goes into day dreaming about the long trip we intend to take next month. We are so far considering the US, New Zealand, Europe (which will mostly be the Balkans), and Asia (Bhutan, Thailand and Myanmar). Sometimes, all our talk of these distant and exotic lands convinces me that we aren’t actually doing this trip, but just discussing this to pass the time, and cheer ourselves up – the exchange rates aren’t helping either!
- I'm also FINALLY getting the time/energy to finish off a lot of little errands that I have been neglecting for many months now – getting new lens/glasses, submitting documents to the bank, redeeming credit card points, settling outstanding bill – little things like that which I tend to neglect in the daily business of living.
Phew! I think
that’s about it. I had actually added a few more on my wish-list (specifically,
swimming classes, and a community project) but I don’t have time to do this much.
I’m trying to wake up early so I have enough time through the day to do all
that I want to do. It helps to make to-do lists for the next day before I go to
sleep, and I get a huge kick from ticking them off the next day.
I can’t say I’m
happy. I’m just not unhappy. I think I’m over the disappointment, but something
happens to remind me of it, and I feel blue for a little while after that. But
nothing can keep me down for too long. For now, I’m fairly content with my busy
schedule, in fact, rather pleased with myself because I’m doing so much in my
break, and I’m looking forward to my holiday and to whatever will happen next.
P.S: Does blogger have the world's worst formatting or what? It took me so much longer to format this post that to write it! (It shows, you say?) I've been thinking of moving to wordpress for a long time now, and this stupid formatting is really convincing me I should just do it.
